2012

Hi. I'm Olly. Olly Norman. Yep.

So, as I write this I am sitting on a balcony in the beautiful village of Kaprun in Austria. Its -6 degrees, snowing and sunny. Fucking mental.

Anyway, I decided to start one of these after reading my friend Harrys blog (HPFleming.blogspot.com). His is very funny and I suggest you read it, mine probably wont be as amusing, but I will still give it a go.

So I thought I would start by writing a bit about the year just gone, 2012 for those of you incapable of normal and sensible thought....Whelton.
The last  year started for me as this one has, stuck in Austria with my family, texting a girl who is at a party making me insanely jealous. I wanna party to.
So after I came home from my skiing holiday, we all went straight back to school and fitted in to the same boring routine. Form time, lessons one, two and three, break, lessons four and five, football (lunch), lessons six and seven, coach home and talk about football.
Nothing exciting really happened through January, or February or even March for that matter. In April though, I went to see Les Miserables with mi familia. It is sooooo good! See it. Also in April I got my devising group for my GCSE Drama. I think its safe to say that we didnt start off on a good note. None of us really knew or liked each other. This basically stayed the same until about June. I still think one of the group didn't like me too much but she must have something wrong with her because I am fucking awesome.
May was a good month. It had my birthday, my sisters birthday and my cousins birthday. Oh yeah, and the Champions League Final. Thank you Didier, love you.
Our end of year exams came and went, I picked up the usual results of mainly B's, one C and one A. Pretty poor I know but oh well. As the school year drew to a close I started to think about the people in my year. I realised that most of them, are infact massive bellends. We have a massive social hierachy. For boys, you have the gym obsessed ones who roll their shirt sleeves up as far as humanly possible and use words such as 'lid', 'bev' and 'safe'. Then you have the football lads/da boiz/JMAS. These guys, which includes me, are the ones that sort of linger everywhere. Some of the Gym LAds like us, some don't. This suits most of us down to the ground as we really couldn't give less of a shit. After us you have the crew. They are all perfectly nice guys, just not very popular.
Now, for girls, the hierachy is a bit less obvious. The popular ones are clear to see, they go to all the parties, only talk to the popular guys and think anyone else is an inferiour specimen. Then you have about 3 other groups or are basically as popular as each other, then there is another group of whom we shall not speak.
Come July and come the summer. Now, can you guess what always comes with summer? No holiday pictures is not the answer. The answer is infact the endless of amount of tweets about how 'fat I am' or 'how my skin is soooooo pale'. SHUT THE FUCK UP. Nobody really cares, its just fishing for compliments. More than once when someone tweets 'oh my god look at my belly I am so fat' with a picture of them in a bikini attached, I have wanted to comment 'yes, you are. Now get over it and go for a run'. I didn't actually put that, I am not that mean.
Into August and que the Olympics. The first event was the Olympic road race coming through my home shithole that is Dorking. Off we trundled to watch Cav,Wiggo,Froome,Millar and Stanard to zoom past on 9grand Pinarellos. We should have one but we had to tow the peloton the entire way. The Americans, Germans and Spanish all chose not to help. Well screw them.
I think the Olympics was an overall success, although swimming...yeah.

AFter the summer we all came back to school and had about a million lectures on how important GCSE's are and how they will mould our future. No pressure then. We also had our GCSE drama piece to perform, that went will and I will actually miss that group. Well I will talk to some of them again but others probably won't be seen dead with me.
November came and with it came the muffled tones of Christmas bells. I love Christmas, food, presents, family and the food, seeing people , food. (thank you Miranda Hart). Christmas day came, I got some cool shit, and went again, leaving me with a full stomach and an eagerness for Doctor Who to start. On the 29th we flew out to Munich and drove here, to Austria. It is cool out here, but being with only my family for an entire week can prove challenging. That is why I thank the Lord for the invention of Whatsapp. I have basically been talking to people non-stop. when I say people. I mean about 3 persons. One of them I haven't even met yet but very much look forward to the time when I will, next tuesday.

So yeah, right there is my 2012. Pretty crap year in which my Gran and Cat both died.

Another year passed, another year single. It's not due to lack of trying, it's because no girl can actually handle my awesomeness, despite about a million hints I gave to one oblivious human being, you know who you are.

I hope you enjoyed this. I know it isn't great but there will be better ones up soon. I promise.

Cheers, Olly

P.S Thank you Harrison, I will try to weave my magic